For those of you that don’t know, I spent Monday evening through Friday this week evening with @turkeyman11a and @mountainrasta! Just thought I’d make a post to let you all know how it went 😀

Monday evening

I arrived at Belfast International Airport not long after 6pm, where turkey and mountain came to pick me up, where we met for the first time! They took me to their home, whilst pointing out several sights in Ireland. That was when I first realised how fucking beautiful Ireland as a country (or sovereign state, depending on how you want to look at it) is!

When we got to their home I met Mrs. TurkeyAndMountain, they gave me a quick tour around (very nice house!), and showed me where I would be staying for the wake. A very nice little mobile that they have. What I found the most amazing about the whole place is that they live on the side of a mountain, and… Trust me, where I come from, mountains don’t exist.

After they’d left me to settle in for a bit, I realised where I was and who I was with, and the excitement and pure joy that hit me at that moment I will never ever forget. It was a moment of pure ‘HOLY SHIT! I AM WITH MOUNTAIN AND TURKEY! AT THEIR FUCKING HOUSE. THEY ARE RIGHT FUCKING THERE.’

Not much happened on Monday, so let us move onto Tuesday!

Tuesday

Tuesday was a day of touring and seeing some of what Ireland had to offer! There are some truly stunning sights in Ireland… Which… I wish I had seen, but clouds didn’t seem to like us very much on that day! Nevertheless, we did manage to go to a castle (turkey and mountain will shout the name in the comments, I hope, but I can’t for the life of me remember what the castle was called, unfortunately). The castle, although these days a ruin, was truly beautiful to see, and would thoroughly recommend it if you ever visit Northern Ireland 😀

Tuesday afternoon was when the clouds really started rolling in. We went for a spin in mountain’s yoke (@mountainrasta, be proud of me!) throughout the Mourne Mountains, but due to the heavy level of clouds, we really couldn’t see very much. We went to get some food, and on the way home, the clouds starting fading slowly, so at one point, we stopped on a hill, and I got some pictures of some of the views really not far from their home!

@turkeyman11a also wanted to show me a spot where physics ceases to exist, where a vehicle left in neutral will roll up a hill. And whilst mountain’s yoke did to a certain extent roll up said hill, it wasn’t the most impressive uphill rolling I’ve seen. Fortunately, there was a van that pulled in to the same spot, and rolled very satisfyingly up the hill. I’m fairly sure they weren’t using the accelerator, for one main reason. It’s fucking awesome to see something like that.

Wednesday

Wednesday was a day of pirate-themed minigolf and driving! The golf was great craic (again, mountain and turkey, BE PROUD OF ME!). We don’t know who won, but honestly, who gives a shit? We were there to have fun, and we really did! Especially after passing the same men’s room twice. We played both lots of 18 holes, some of which were much easier than others (I got holes in one in some, and had to give up after reaching the maximum number of goes on others). Turkey and mountain both managed to get a hole in one in the last hole of the first set, which earned them a very special reward! A gold doubloon, which entitles them to a free game, which is why I was very touched when turkey offered me his.

Whilst we were playing the second set of holes, I got (rather rudely, methinks), spat at by a wooden totem pole… I didn’t feel too bad about it, though, because I know that turkey had been spat at by one previously.

And, of course, being from PirateCraft, we couldn’t resist the opportunity to pose for a group photo beneath the pirate golf sign!

Left to right: turkey, me, mountain

Wednesday afternoon, after grabbing some grub at a great local Chinese, we headed to Ballaghaderreen to pick up Little Miss TurkeyAndMountain. ’twas a long drive, but got to see lots of both Northern and the Republic of Ireland. After arriving in Ballaghaderreen, turkey was really not looking forward to the drive home, but managed to suck it up and made it without sleeping… For the most part. Little Miss TurkeyAndMountain had bought a gift, too, which, although absolutely lovely and currently sitting on the wall above my bed, was completely unnecessary (I didn’t go to Ireland to be given gifts, after all!).

Thursday

Thursday was a really rather quiet day, we didn’t go out or do anything much. Thursday afternoon, as mountain so eloquently puts it, I ‘showed his kids how to kill each other’.

It’s worth mentioning that during a 2v1 (me vs mountain and turkey), mountain did get cut, and I will forever feel shit for that (really sorry buddy… Love you <3). He said it wasn’t too bad… But it did bleed… A lot.

Thursday evening, mountain seemed well enough to show me his air rifle, and let myself and turkey convince him to shoot for a bit. This… Turned out to be a bad idea, as one of turkey’s shots rebounded off the TV and hit him in the waist before, bouncing off the yoke between him and I. It was at this point (quite hilariously, I find), that turkey started jumping up and down with joy. Despite getting the amount of abuse he did on Friday, mountain was still very keen to go paintballing on Friday!

Friday

The morning of my last day in Ireland came. The day we went paintballing. On a mountain. An overgrown mountain. Which made it very hard to move. We started off playing Civil War (the teams were myself and turkey vs mountain, Mrs TurkeyAndMountain and Little Miss TurkeyAndMountain). Civil war was simple enough. The two teams lined up on opposite sides of the arena, and shot each other. You get hit, you’re out. You don’t. take a step towards the enemy team. Turkey and I ended up winning Civil War.

I won’t bore you with all the details, but we played a Capture the Cripple sort of game, as well as some Castle Defence. Then came the free for alls. The first free for all was just that. Two lives, 10 second respawn time. I lost that one very quickly.

And then mountain, turkey and I played a free for all Capture the Flag. Mountain ended up running out of ammo, and declared himself out. That left just me and turkey, and as soon as mountain said he was out, I saw turkey sprint for the flag, which was behind cover. So I ran up to the cover and started shooting at turkey from above the cover, and followed him as he reached the exit. I ended up shooting him in the back, so he dropped the flag and ran back to his base to start his 10-second respawn time. At this point, I ran as fast as I could (which, admittedly, is still slow). However, it seemed fast enough… I grabbed the flag, and started running back to my base, with my back to turkey. I was sweating so much running uphill that my mask started slipping off. Nevertheless, I kept going… And then I tripped, and fell up the mountain. I was convinced that I was going to lose at this point, yet I got up and kept running towards my base. And I made it. I threw the flag down, took my mask off, and leaned against the tires… And nearly threw up. Twice. Basically… I rekt turkeyman11a ez 10 hearts.

And then I went home. Basically.

So… Ya… That’s what went on in my week in Ireland 😀